Redefining beauty – How ’bout dat?

Is it the outer appearance or the inner beauty what counts? Within a short spell a ripple of reactions ignites. Only because some beauty standards were broken. A snap-shot and its’ reactions…

Me i thy standardet të bukurisë – po si !? A është pamja e jashtme apo bukuria e brendshme cila ka rëndësi? Brenda një kohe të shkurtër ndizet një valë e reaksioneve. Vetëm për shkak se disa standarde te bukurisë u thyen. Nje fotografi dhe disa reagime…

 

 

Redefining beauty- Young-Migrants
Breaking the standards of beauty

 

 

Standardet e bukurise i keni konstruktu ju. Une i thej,une e pranoj veten qysh jom.

 

You have created the standards of beauty. And I am the one who breaks them. I accept myself the way I am!

– Adelina Tershani

 

 

Redefining beauty
Breaking the standards of beauty

 

 

Per shume vite kam ndjere turp per shkak te lekures sime. Fillova te mbaj shishka qe t fshihja puqrrat ne ball. E kur u rrita pak fillova te fshihesha pas grimit, qe te ndihesha pak me e bukur. Shpesh mbyllesha ne banjo e qaja perpara pasqyres, duke u lutur per nje lekur te mire. Per shume vite e urrejta pamjen time… Por, sot nuk ndihem me e shemtuar! Nuk do lejoj qe ca puqrra te me ndalojn dashurin ndaj vetevetes. Nuk do lejoj qe mendimet dhe komentet e te tjereve te me shqetesojn! Ndihem e bukur panevarresisht imperfeksioneve qe fytyra ime ka. Ne fakt te gjith jemi te bukur, thjesht duhet te hapesh mendje dhe zemren!

 

For years I have felt shame and embarrassment because of my skin. I used to have bangs, so they would hide the pimples of my forehead. I used a lot of makeup so I could feel a little prettier. I used to lock my self in the bathroom and cry in front of the mirror, wishing for a beautiful skin. For so long I have hated the way I looked, but today I no longer feel ugly. I no longer will let a little pimple stop loving my self. I no longer care of what others have to say about my skin! I am beautiful with all the little imperfections of my face! So is everyone else! Just open your heart and mind and you will see it!

– Oketa Basha

 

 

redefining beauty
Breaking the standards of beauty

 

 

Nuk është e lehtë me u tregu e guximshme dhe me dalë jashtë pa u mundu me i mbulu aknet. Duhet me qenë e gatshme me u përballë me shikime të ndryshme e ndoshta edhe me ndonjë koment të pakëndshëm. Mirëpo me kalimin e kohës fillon mos me u mërzit ma nga shikimet e nga fjalët. Thjesht e pranon veten ashtu siç je dhe kur kalon rrugëve të qytetit nuk e ul shikimin nga turpi e pasiguria. Kjo është koha kur ndihesh në paqe me veten, kur asnjë shikim apo mendim i tjerëve nuk vlen ma shumë se liria dhe vetëbesimi yt. Kjo është ndjenja ma e mirë që ekziston!

 

It‘s not easy to be that confident to go out without covering your acne. You have to be prepared to be confronted by different looks or also uncomfortable comments about your skin. But after a time those looks and comments people give you – they won‘t bother you anymore. This will be the time when you finally will find peace within yourself, when you realize that no other look or opinion is worth your freedom and your self-confidence. This is the best feeling ever!

– Medina Mehmeti

 

 

 

redefining beauty
Breaking the standards of beauty

 

 

Thuani jo Kacit e Sellmes, thuani po vetvetes

 

Say ‘no’ to Kaci and Sellma, say ‘yes’ to yourself  *

– Taulant Ramadani

 

*Kaci and Sellma are two famous make-up and hairstylists from Kosova. With this sentence he does not mean to offend them in any way. With this statement he wanted to ”lighten up the mood” of the interview in a ”funny way” (quote), meaning that people should not feel obligated to hide behind makeup just to please other people. Since everyone knows Kaci and Sellma as good makeup-artists and hairstylists he included them in his sentence. NOTE: There is nothing wrong with going to makeup-artists and there is nothing wrong with doing makeup in general.

 

 

 

redefining beauty
Breaking the standards of beauty

 

 

Hej, une jam Blendi. Do te doja ta ndaja me ju mesazhin qe me eshte perquar si nje person nen ndjenjen e akneve. Ne fillim isha ne siklet nga pamja e lekures sime, por me kalimin e kohes duke pare dhe persona te tjere me te njejtin problem sikurse timin, me solli ne mendje se nje sjellje e te qenit I terhequr ne vetvete dhe ndaj rrethit nuk do te ndikonte ne te miren time, e as kundrejt pamjes qe me shoqeronin aknet. Perfundimisht, une vendosa te vazhdoja kundrejte ketyre ‘’te metave’’ dhe duke menduar e thene se duke qene unik nuk do te thote te mos jesh si te tjeret, eshte thjeshte menyra jote unikale.

 

Hi, I’m Blendi. I’d like to share the message I learned from having acne. At the beginning I was embarrassed of my skin, but then seeing people with the same skin condition and realising that locking myself up  wasn’t going to make my acne disappear, I decided to go as I am with all my “flaws” and keeping in mind that being different isn’t just not being mainstream – it is also your power.

– Blend Bytyqi

 

 

 

redefining beauty
Breaking the standards of beauty

 

 

Uhh cka e ki moj ftyren keshtu, a po e lyn me naj sen pse s’ po shkon te qiky mjeke qe e njoh une shume i mire osht, a i ke bo qito analiza , boj valla se ti je e re.. amo hajt se te heken dikur!

 

Ewww, what happend to your skin? Do you apply something to it so it disappears? Why don’t you go to this doctor that I know, he’s very good. Did you do any skin tests? Do them, ‘cause you are soo young.. But well, maybe they’ll disappear soon.

– Arbresha Uka

 

 

 

redefining beauty
Breaking the standards of beauty

 

 

Për shumë nga ne – efekti ansore më të zakonshme të problemeve të lëkures është izolimi . Ne nuk duam të shihemi nga tjerët ashtu sic dukemi. Mund të fshihen shumë nga të „metat fizike“ por jo aknet. Ështe ende aty, gjëja e parë që njerzit vrejn tek ne është fytyra jone . Per ne është e veshtire te imagjinojme se njerzit mund të shohin tek ne -NJERIUN – pas akneve

 

For most of us, the most common and unfortunate side effect of skin problems is isolation. We don’t want to be seen the way we look. You can hide a lot of physical flaws, but not acne. It’s right there, the first thing people notice about us: our face. And it’s hard for some of us to imagine that people can see the face – the PERSON – behind the acne.

[ QuoteSource: Yancy Lael, Soulful Skincare: The ultimate guide to radically transforming your complexion]

– Agnesa Hoxhaj

 

 

 

redefining beauty
Breaking the standards of beauty

 

 

Dua t’i tregoj botës, e sidomos atyre që e kanë problemin e njejtë sikur unë, se ne nuk kemi pse të fshehim atë që është e dukshme! Ne jemi të bukur kështu siç jemi, edhe pse kjo nuk përputhet me standardet e bukurisë të cilat i ka vendosur shoqëria, ne nuk i bëjmë dëm askujt me atë që e shfaqim veten tonë të vërtetë dhe për këtë arsye ne nuk duam të sillemi ashtu siç tjerëve u pelqen!

 

I want to tell the world and especially the people who share the same ‘struggle’ as I do – that we don’t have to hide what is seen. We are beautiful the way we have been created, even if it doesn’t fit into the beauty standards that our society has set for us. We don’t do harm to anyone by embracing ourselves and this is why we should not behave the way other people would rather like to see us!

– Elona Beqiraj

 

 

English:

People around us, media and advertisement tend to reduce us on our acne and make us feel bad having skin that “doesn’t fit” the ideals – creating insecurities, self-hatred and a lack of self acceptance towards humans.

But we humans are more than a body, more than a face and more than just a skin. Our skin, that shell that surrounds our soul (where the real beauty hides), doesn’t define us.

When I uploaded a photo of me, when I was in my natural state, I didn’t expect that it will get so much attention from my followers. Like all people that post selfies on instagram or facebook nowadays – I also posted one of myself – without any deeper thought behind it. It’s obvious that my skin is not ‘clear’, it’s not the way society wants it to be. But why should I waste my time covering my picture with filters and retouch-effects to hide my acne? Just to please the eye of the beholder?

Within a short time after I uploaded that selfie – more than hundreds of people commented on it and started to tag their friends. I was surprised and didn’t expect that, since it wasn’t such a big thing to me to post a photo of myself the way I am. With or without those pimples on my face. A lot of people wrote me how I inspired them, how I gave them strength to love themselves. Even though it made me happy that I helped other people to embrace themselves, I couldn’t quite understand why I was getting this ‘extra bunch’ of respect simply by being myself? Slowly I started to understand that, what I did was obviously not defined as ‚normal‘, otherwise my photo would not have caused so much attention.

It wasn’t just the positive feedback that surprised me. I have also received messages of people asking me how I dare to post such an ugly photo and that nobody wants to see my „f*cking“ „disgusting“ pimples. Other people messaged me that they would’ve killed themselves, if they would look like me and that I should delete that post because it offends them. But the most shocking one was when a woman messaged me, that she wants to puke when she sees my face and would love to slap my face, so all my pimples would disappear.

Instead of deleting that photo and hiding myself I started to embrace my real self even more. It was a lesson for me that inspired me to create my own photo-project and upcoming exhibition with photographs of other humans, that live with acne and so-called „imperfections“. The idea of that project is to break with the beauty standards that the society has set for us and to start embracing our pure selves.

Instead of losing our energy by judging other people and bullying them – why don’t we use that energy to teach the kids of our world that the real beauty lies within us? Let’s enlighten their souls and minds, let’s educate them, let’s make them love each other, let’s teach them what really counts and most of all let’s help them to embrace and love OURSELVES.

Last december (2016) I carried my photoproject out, which is called ”Redefining Beauty” and is located in Prishtina, Kosova. I wanted to show other people around the world that no-one is alone with so-called ‘Imperfections’. We wanted to inspire other people to feel more comfortable with themselves by showing them how comfortable we are with ourselves. I am planning to carry out another exhibition with these photos so that this topic gets more attention and people will be more conscious about this issue in our society.

You can see my photos also on my facebook account and follow me to get updates of an upcoming exhibition.

Albanian:

Njerezit rreth nesh, mediet dhe reklamimet tentojne te na ulin poshte per shkak te akneve dhe na bejne te ndihemi se nuk kemi lekure qe “perkon” me idealet, duke krijuar pasiguri, vete urrejtje dhe nje mungese te pranimit te vetvetes drejt qenieve njerezore.

Bashke, ne do ti thyejme keto standarde sureale dhe vuajtjet e panevojshme.

Në momentin që e postova fotografinë, u befasova tepër se si një foto e imja arriti të tërheq aq vëmendje për një kohë shumë të shkurtër. Shumë njerez shkruan që ju kam dhënë motiv dhe forcë të madhe, dhe treguan respekt, edhe pse unë jam falënderuese ndaj atyre komenteve pozitive, prap mbes e befasuar se pse ata më japin fjalë miradhje dhe respekti duke qenë unë thjesht VETËVETJA por, nuk ishin mesazhet pozitive të vetmet që arritën në adresën time.

  • “Si nuk të vjen turp të postosh këtë fotografi, askush nuk don të t’i shef puqrat!”
  • “Kuku hej, sa gjynah!”
  • “Ishalla të hiqen sa më shpejtë puqrat, e bukur qenke, por puqrat të shëmtojnë fytyrën deri në “
  • “T’kisha qenë sikur ti, unë do e mbysja veten, kështu asnjëherë nuk do dilja nga shtëpia. Largoje këtë foto!”

Këto janë disa prej komenteve dhe mesazheve qe më arritën. D.m.th. se ne vajzat dhe djemtë tanë duhet t’i mësojmë që te fshihen? Të turpërohen per një gjë, për të cilën nuk mbajnë faj? T’ua imponojmë që bukuria është vetëm në sipërfaqe? T’u ngjallim komplekse të cilat janë të dëmshme?!

Pse nuk e japim tërë fuqinë tonë T’i ndriçojmë mendjet dhe shpirtat e femijeve, t’i shkollojmë, të duam njëri- tjetrin. T’i mësojmë se çfarë është e vlefshme e çka jo, dhe në fund më e rëndësishmja; t’i mësojmë të jenë VETËVETJA!

Ne dhjetor 2016 e kam realizuar nje fotoprojekt ne Prishtine cilli quhet „Redefining Beauty“.

Ideja prapa keti fotoprojekti eshte ti thejme standartet e bukurise qe shoqeria i ka vendosur per ne edhe te fillojme ta dojm vetveten tone ashtu siq jemi. Doja ti tregoja njerzve tjere anembane botes se ashkush nuk eshte vetem me „imperfektione“. Deshirojme ti frymezojme njerzit qe te ndihen te kenaqur me vetveten duke i treguar atyre sa rehat jemi ne me vetveten. E kam ne plan ta organizoj nje ekspozite me keto foto sepse mendoj qe kjo teme duhet te merr me shume vemendje tek njerzit qe te jene me te vetdijshem per kete qeshtje ne shoqerine tone.

Mund ti shihni fotot e mia edhe në facebook account dhe më ndiqni ne blogun per ma shume informata ne lidhje me ekspoziten.

 

Bilder: Elona Beqiraj © privat